I started off January 2010 dieting. I tried to follow a low calorie; I lost the first week and every week after that I stayed the same despite trying hard the whole time. Come February I was fed up and took up my friend's offer of starting Weight Watchers. She had been going to meetings and doing well so she sent me the information. I bought myself a calculator, Eat Out book and Shop Book and often bought the magazines for inspiration. I had days off for birthdays and such but I didn't have one slip up in the entire 9 months that I was doing the diet. Every time I didn't count points it was a planned event. I started off sceptical; I couldn't believe I could have McDonalds, Chinese and chocolate and still lose weight. I started eating healthier and incorporated exercise and I consistently lost. I started off at 19 stone 10lbs. At 5 foot 8 inches that made me a size 26 and a BMI of over 42. By Christmas that year I was 14 stone 8.4lbs (only a few pounds from being under 200lbs). I dropped 4 dress sizes to become a small size 18 jeans. Weight watchers allowed me to have anything I wanted and the pure fact that I could have it if I wanted meant that often, I didn't. That or I'd fit it into my points and realise that it really wasn't worth it so I didn't bother again.
Christmas came and I managed to gain 15lbs in 2 weeks but it took weeks and weeks coming off. I yoyo'd a bit after that until a family tragedy happened that meant I comfort ate and managed to put on more than 2 stone in the month after. After that I pretty much gave up and started to slowly gain everything back. Slower than that first month, thankfully! I'd been suffering from depression for some time but it became even worse to the point that I just couldn't deal with it. Eventually I got help from the doctors but given the time it took and the time to find the right antidepressants, the right dose and settle down I had a hard time finding the motivation to diet or to stick with it when I was. By this time it was October 2011 and I decided to join Weight Watchers online in the hope that it would spur me on to stick to it. Paying the monthly fee did force me to stick to it and it was like a switch. Unfortunately with the continued depression and the fact that my body no longer wanted to be kind to me I lost between 1 and 2 stone and gave up again. Come April 2012 I decided to give up on dieting all together rather than go around and around in my dieting rut. That lead me to my highest weight ever; the weight at which I started Weight Watchers for the third time. I'm again doing it by myself, having bought all the new books. I miss the Weight Watchers app, which along with the blog section was the best part of WW online. I did, however find a good app which is similar for about £2 and I'm using that now. I started off at in the second week of January and weighed in at a very depressing 21 stone 5.4lb. The only saving grace was that it was under 300lbs (by a measly 0.6 of a pound, but still not 300lbs!) I had my weigh in today and I have lost 8.4lbs in 33 days, an average of 1.8lbs per day (according to my tracker app!) This time around I'm trying not to give too much focus to anything. I'm focusing on if I've lost, not how much I've lost and I'm focusing on life in general rather than obsessing over the diet. Time is flying and it seems to be working well for me. My size 26 jeans, which I reluctantly moved back into have started to feel loose and my coat which was getting tight is fitting much better. Strangely, note that I got to the point where I was 1 stone 9lbs heavier than the first time I started WW but still in the same dress size. My body is a baffling thing.
It's depressing to think how far I got and how far I am going to have to go again but it's better than gaining, which is really my only other option. I hate not being able to look around clothes shops any more or enjoy buying clothes or be able to wear something pretty to make myself feel better when I'm having an 'ugly day' because I don't feel like I look any better in anything. I'm hoping to change all that and document it all for you. I really hope to get lots of readers and comments because the most motivating thing for me is being able to write about my experiences and know that people are actually out there reading it and caring.
You did it once you can do it again. Have faith in yourself!
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